I saw it happening. Joshua walks with his walking stroller and then stops to sway a bit. Like in slow motion he suddenly starts falling backwards. My father and I both sit and watch how it happens but neither one of us can connect action to the knowledge that our experience of life has taught us - he will hit his head on the wooden floor. And he does. And screams. I rush there and swoop him up in my arms.
Parts of me cherish these moments. His pain is my gain. I get to hold him, caress him and he is still and receiving. He is injured in battle and he hides in my arms. He snuggles his soft face in the corner of my neck and I feel his cheeks with my chin - does it get better than this? But he is well rested and has just eaten and this slice of motherly bliss is soon over for he has discovered the standing lamp just next to the sofa. Is not the baby brain amazing? The drive for knowledge is pure and explosive, like an avalanche - impossible to stop and takes everything with it. Joshua starts using me as the climbing aide to get to his goal and after some attempts he can grab the pole with his chubby hand. He starts to rock it. Suddenly I remember two years ago another little soft baby doing the exact same thing. Then we had a few months of battle us against her which she won flat down. All our IKEA lamps broke by our then 1 year old Maja. Now I just smile. This is his life and I have just had front seat to it.
The Proud Blonde Chick
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